One thing I forgot to post about occurred on day 28 (Sunday). I reached out to a gay Christian singer/songwriter/entertainer named Davis Mallory. I was leafing through an Out magazine that I found at Patrick’s place (my second Couchsurfing host in Dunedin) when I found an article on Davis. The article said he had grown up in a very strong Christian home and that he still considers himself a strong Christian. As I don’t find too many gay Christians to talk with, especially ones that consider themselves “strong”, I was instantly intrigued. I found his Instagram profile, and I decided to follow him and send him a message. I was shocked when he actually messaged me back within minutes. We spoke very briefly, and I expressed wanting to get to know him better and pointed him to my blog. Since that time, we have exchanged a few other messages, although with him being a celebrity, I understand that he doesn’t have a ton of time to talk to me.
But I hope to get to know him better and more personally in the future. I still don’t know what exactly he believes regarding Christianity, so I’m looking forward to future conversations about his faith and his experience growing up in the church and realizing he was attracted to men.
Day 29 (Monday Sep 17) – My third week in GigCity started with a little disappointment, but as I’ve learned on this trip, disappointment can easily turn into gratitude by shifting your perspective on what life is about…what is truly important. And for me, this week would confirm that I am never really alone, that I have the Spirit of God living inside of me, and that my adventure is still just starting.
I spent some time this morning at Blend Cafe in Mosgiel writing up a post about journaling.
I had also booked a surf lesson on the previous Friday for a Monday surf lesson through www.bookme.co.nz, basically a Groupon-like site for New Zealand. I was able to get a group surf lesson for $36 NZD. When I woke up this morning, however, it was cold, windy, and rainy. I called the Esplanade Surf School at 7am and 9am to ask if they would still be holding the surf lesson. Both times, I had to leave a voicemail message. And in the absence of any additional information, I decided to head to St. Clair beach where the surf lesson was being held at 11am. I called one last time at 10am to let them know I was coming, but I still had to leave a voicemail message.
I took the bus into Dunedin downtown, and then walked the two miles in the rain to the beach. I arrived right at 11am and made a video post to Instagram and took a picture and video.
I waited a few minutes for any teachers to arrive, and when no one did, I called the shop again. They finally answered and said they hadn’t gotten my booking from Bookme, and they were unsure they could find an instructor. They said they would check and call me back. While I waited, I walked to a local cafe and got a hot chocolate to warm me up. I also started to journal about my morning and how it was going to turn out differently than I expected but it was still a worthwhile trip to see the beach on a rainy day.
The Surf School eventually got back to me and had to reschedule my lesson for Tuesday, but they upgraded me to a private lesson for the booking issues that occurred. Plus, the weather looked much better on Tuesday. So once again, everything worked out.
I walked back into the city, hung out at Starbucks for another hour to read and work on my playlists before heading back to Mosgiel for the night. I texted Guy to ask if he had plans for the upcoming weekend, and he let me know he had to work, so I probably wouldn’t be able to see him this week. I had noticed a trend that I was doing most of the initiation on contacting him, so I decided I would stop texting him and see when he would text me.
As I got ready for bed, I had several itchy areas on my body, and I thought the fungus was spreading, so I put the anti-fungal cream on the new “infected” areas and went to sleep.
Day 30 (Tuesday Sep 18) – I had woken up twice in the night to itch the new rash that was appearing on my body. I was very uncomfortable and was worried that I wouldn’t be able to do my surf lesson. I knew I would need to go in to see the doctor again, and so that was my priority this morning. I left Mosgiel around 7:30am and got to Dunedin by 8:15am. I grabbed a Mocha Frappucino from Starbucks (I decided to treat myself since I was feeling poorly) and waited until the medical center opened at 8:30am. Here’s a couple of pictures of the rash on my torso, but it was also on my thighs, legs and feet.
Luckily, they had no appointments that morning, so they got me in right away. While the doctor couldn’t explain the new rash, she said it wasn’t related to the fungus. She also gave me my blood test results which were all negative. Since the original fungal areas seemed to be clearing up, she decided to switch me off the fungal creme and just put me on anti-histamine pills, a non-drowsy pill for the day, and a nighttime pill that would help me sleep without itching. I also got a bottle of low-dose hydro-cortisone cream to apply on infected areas that would also help with the itch.
The good news was that she didn’t think it was being caused by food or environment, and she said exercise wouldn’t be a problem. So I could still go to my surf lesson at 11am. Looking back, the rash was probably exacerbated when I put the anti-fungal cream on it, as I got the same reaction when I took the anti-fungal pills the week prior.
On the walk over, my mood improved as I was on anti-histamines. It was also a beautiful day, and I snapped a few pics (a rainbow bench, a blooming tree and a surfboard bench where I caught my shadow as well).
After waiting a few minutes, my instructor, Helena showed up. She had moved to New Zealand from Sweden to complete her Ph.D. in Physics. She was also a very active, sporty, person, and so she taught surf lessons on the side, which she said helped with the burn-out she encountered while pursuing her Ph.D. She got me suited up in a wet-suit, boots, and a hood and then we practiced getting up on the board on the beach for several minutes. Once she was satisfied with my skills, we took the board out in the ocean. I tried to get up for about 30 minutes before we came back in to rest, talk over what I was doing wrong, and practice more on the beach. I went back out for another 30 minutes, and eventually got up for about 3 seconds on a wave. I called it quits soon after, because I was starting to get cold, tired, and hungry. Before leaving the beach, though, I made a video post of the 3 things I learned from my surf experience.
One of the 3 main things that I wanted to accomplish in Dunedin was done. Ideally, I had wanted to be taught to surf by a cute college boy, but we can’t always get what we want, right? In general, this was a great experience, and I look forward to surfing more (most likely in Australia as next month I head up into the mountains of NZ to live in Queenstown).
I was pretty tired by the afternoon, so I went back to Mosgiel to rest and recharge. I got some more Subway and I finished Season 10 of Ru Paul’s drag race. I was actually a little disappointed with the winner, as I wanted a different queen to win (Asia O’Hara), but it was still an excellent season.
Day 31 (Wednesday Sep 19) – Today was the big day to see if I would be purchasing a car, as well as attend a Poetry event that Jasmine had invited me to back on September 3rd (I met her on the bus trip down to Dunedin). I was pretty set on getting the vehicle since it was being offered at a very low price ($1000 NZD) and I would be able to use it to travel between cities and take my bike with me. I just wanted to make sure a mechanic looked at it before I bought it to ensure I wasn’t getting a lemon. So, I rode my bike into the city (see my Apple Watch activity log to the right), spent a few hours at Starbucks reading and starting my week 2 Blog post. I also went to AA (the AAA equivalent here in NZ) as they offered third party car insurance (as I wasn’t taking any insurance on the car itself due to its low value). I found out that I could be insured for less than $100 for the next 9 months, and Patrick had checked into registration costs, and those would also be under $100 for the 9 moths. So, $1200 for a working car that is registered and insured seemed like a great deal to me! I picked up the car from Patrick later that afternoon, drove over to Car Connection, and made a quick video before leaving the car with them. The entire process took about 45 minutes for them to inspect the car.
Car Connection told me it would be around $500 or so to replace a belt that was worn and do other general service and maintenance. I was expecting this, and I wanted a vehicle that would definitely be roadworthy for the next 9 months. The cost seemed reasonable so I set-up an appointment for Thursday morning to drop off the car.
On my drive back to Patrick’s place, as I was still getting used to driving on the left side of the road and using right hand turn signals (I switched on the wipers a number of times when I meant to use a turn signal initially), I hit some kind of bump in the road. I don’t know what it was, and I was going somewhat fast, although again, no idea what the actual KM/hour speed was. What ended up happening? I got a flat tire!
While I was initially concerned about my ability to put on the spare tire, I soon realized those fears were unfounded. I easily replaced the flat with the spare and was back on my way to pick up my bike. The tire had a big gash, so I’d need to pay for a new tire along with the repairs on Thursday. But, it felt like it was my car already, since we had been through an ordeal together. It was also beautiful to have my bike fit in the back. I could just envision my suitcase and two other backpacks fitting in to take me up to Queenstown on October 1st.
Due to the flat, I didn’t have time to get dinner before getting to the Poetry Evening at 6pm. But, once again, God provided as there was a big spread of nuts, cheeses, crackers, veggies, fruits, and desserts…plus several choices for wine. So, I was able to satisfy my hunger as well as feed my soul through hearing poets speak their poetry. It was a wonderful evening with some very powerful poems being shared.
After the event, I spoke with Mali, one of the people responsible for putting the event on, and we were able to connect due to our tattoos. She had both arms fully tattooed with beautiful images that she tied to her past or present self. And I was able to share the meaning of my tattoo as well. Plus, I got about 4 more glasses of wine from her as they had quite a bit leftover when the event finished!
From there, I went to a Couchsurf meet and greet at The Craic, an Irish Tavern in the Octagon. It was a small event, only 4 other guys, and 3 of them were hosts in Dunedin. I was feeling nice from the food and wine, so I spent 45 minutes with them and we just talked about each other’s adventures as well as funny Couchsurfing experiences.
I didn’t really connect with any of the guys very much, so I headed over to Dog with Two Tails, another bar a block off the Octagon that was having an open mic night. Jasmine had told me to stop by if I didn’t stay at my Couchsurf event, and so I checked in to see what was going on. I thought I might read a poem myself if there was an opening. It was packed, and I couldn’t find a seat. The list of performers was also quite long, so I only stayed long enough to find Jasmine and exchange phone numbers to hopefully hang out again later in the week.
On the walk back to the car, I got another power box mural to add to my collection…
I was able to drive my car back to Mosgiel, so rather than taking 45 minutes by bus, I was back at Gary’s in 15 minutes. As I prepared for bed, I laid out my jewelry in an interesting combination. It looked artistic so I took a picture which I would later use in a post about my jewelry. It also briefly became my profile pic on Facebook and Instagram. The silver writing beside it is on the small table in my room. I believe it is someone’s name or some kind of message that one of Gary’s previous couchsurfers left. I didn’t know what it meant when I first wrote this post, but I found out a few days later and posted the below comment in My Jewelry post…
***This is the type of coincidence that occurs in my life***
In the picture with my jewelry that I originally posted as a profile picture, there is some Maori writing on the table in the photograph. I didn’t realize this when I took the photo, but the Maori word I captured is “kaha”, while the word covered by my jewelry is “kia”. Their meanings have so much relevance and value to my adventure and my life.
kaha
1. (verb) to be strong, able, capable, courageous, intense, energetic
kia kaha
1. be strong, get stuck in, keep going
Day 32 (Thursday Sep 20) – Thursday morning I had to be at Car Connection by 8am to drop off the car, so I was up early and out the door by 7:30am. I planned to hang out at Coffee Culture (where I had previously met Guy after my bike failed two weeks ago) for the day while they repaired the car. It took longer than I expected, so I spent most of the day there. At least it has an amazing view…
I also found a key to one of the previous power box murals that I photographed. On the side of the power box, they put a key to identify the famous New Zealand writers who are pictured.
My time in the coffee shop let me finish up my week 2 in GigCity post (which took several hours), and I felt very accomplished to get another week on my blog. I finished around lunchtime and then walked to Cableways Bar and Bistro to get a burger. I hung out there for a while reading another book (a new Brandon Sanderson novel set in the Mistborn world) and eventually walked back to the repair shop around 3pm. It was perfect timing as they were just about to call me.
While the good news was that the car was completed, the bad news is that they found a few extra seals that needed to be replaced, so the total repair cost (including the tire) was $1000 NZD. But, in the grand scheme of things, I was still getting a dependable car for $2400 NZD, which was actually only $1600 USD. I love this exchange rate!
I drove the car back to Mosgiel and used Gary’s vacuum to clean it up a bit. Dusk soon hit, and so I took a break with the car until the morning. I had some dinner, read, journaled, and called it a day.
Day 33 (Friday Sep 21) – I woke up early, as I wanted to get the car cleaned out. I had my third Couchsurf in Dunedin set-up for this weekend, and I could use the car to drive into the city later that afternoon. This would work out perfectly, as I had a scuba dive scheduled for Saturday, so I needed to take all my dive equipment. Once I got the car insides wiped out with cleaning cloths, I packed up my stuff and got some pics of Tuatoru, my car.
Tuatoru is Māori for third, and since I am TrinityDreamer (a little obsessed with 3s) and this was the third car that I’ve owned in my life, it fit perfectly. I also decided Tuatoru is a boy…I am homosexual after all. 🙂
Before heading in to Dunedin, I stopped by a gas station to use their vacuum. Gary’s had gotten some of the dust and debris, but I needed something more powerful to get in the cracks and crevices. So I vacummed it out and then noticed a different setting to put a scent into the upholstery, so I chose new car smell and put some “cologne” on Tuatoru. The final step was going through the car wash, and suddenly, he was a brand new (to me) car!
In an earlier video, I made a comment that Tuatoru had over 200,000 MILES, but I should have said 200,000 KILOMETERS, which is actually only 132,000 miles. So, while he’s had a long life already, he is set to go the distance! An added bonus was that I found $3 NZD in change that I used to pay for the vacuuming, and I found two unicorn heads. I had some fun times with a unicorn bracelet this summer when I lived with Johnathan and Kendra. My niece Freya had a unicorn head snap-on bracelet that I would often try to “take” as I thought it was beautiful. While I never acquired it, I was happy that the universe gave me my own unicorns…and 2 of them at that!
When I arrived at my Couchsurf in Dunedin, I was pleasantly surprised at how nice it was. My host, River, a 21 year old uni student was actually looking after his Aunt and Uncle’s house, which explained a lot. This was, by far, my best couchsurf experience up to this point. Amazing bed, private room, incredible shower and bathroom, and the best part was that it was only six blocks from the Octagon, so I was virtually in the center of the city.
The rest of Friday I did feel a little lonely, as I couldn’t get any replies on Grindr, and it was too late to message anyone in the United States. I ended up eating by myself, reading some more, and walking around downtown. Around 10pm, I ended up back at River’s place. He and a friend of his (Miles) had just gotten back from a house party, so they were having some food and tea. I had a cup of tea with them, and Miles and I launched into a rousing discussion of my story, God, the problem of evil in the world, and many other issues. It was an interesting conversation, and I appreciated just being able to talk with someone for a while. I had to call it a night at 11am, as I was going scuba diving in the morning.
Day 34 (Saturday Sep 22) – I had to be at Dive Otago by 8:30am to participate in the dive for the day. It was actually connected to Project Aware, a week-long cleanup effort of the oceans around the globe by scuba divers. What it meant for me was that I could get 2 dives in for only $10, and I would be cleaning up trash from the ocean.
The dives went swimmingly! Unfortunately, I was very lax on getting any pictures once again, but I promise that when I dive the great barrier reef, I will have plenty of pictures for you. But, it was an awesome morning/afternoon spent scuba diving, and I felt very competent once again in my navigation and buoyancy.
After scuba, I grabbed a quick lunch at Wendy’s and then went back to River’s place to rinse all my scuba gear. I even had to hand dry quite a bit of it, as River wanted me to place it outside to dry. I didn’t feel comfortable with leaving thousands of dollars of scuba gear outside, especially since I was headed out for the night, so I dried most of it and left my wetsuit to dry inside.
Where was I headed? Jasmine (from Poetry Night) had invited me to a regional rugby game – Otago vs. Canterbury. I met her and her boyfriend Mike at 5pm outside the gates and we took in the game, quenching our thirst with cider and beer, and having some chips (aka french fries). I discovered that I really enjoyed watching rugby, as the clock rarely stops and there is action going on almost all the time. I even got a few pictures! Perhaps the best part…at one point during the game, one of the defenders had his shorts pulled down, so I got to see a rugby players bare bottom for several seconds (as defending was more important than pulling up his pants). 😛
After the game, Mike, Jasmine, and I went to Del Sol, a local Mexican restaurant. While it wasn’t impressed with the food (more Tex-Mex really), I had a great time sharing a meal and sharing stories. Jasmine also grew up in a religious home and so we talked about that. I’m always interested to see what someone believes after years of being in that kind of environment. I’m finding it often has very little relevance to their beliefs as an adult.
Once dinner was finished, they wanted me to come with them to another bar, Carousel, but my Apple Watch had gone into low power mode at the game and I was still several stands and calories away from completing my activity circles. Since I was having a perfect month, I wanted to keep that streak going, so I headed back to River’s. On the way home, I encountered another power box, this time with some powerful lyrics from a New Zealand band called The Chills. It actually gave me the chills to read it…
Each evening the sun sets in five billion places,
Seen by ten billion eyes set in five billion faces,
Then they close in a daze & wait for the dawning,
But the daylight and sunrise
Are brighter in our eyes,
Where night cannot devour golden solar power
I got home around 9:40pm, and charged up my watch enough to put it on by 9:55pm to capture a stand. But, for some reason, my watch didn’t register it, even though I was standing, jumping, and waving my arms around for 5 minutes.
Frustration!!! Slight rage!!! Because by missing that stand, there was no way I could complete the stand goal. I could only log a stand for 10-11 and 11-12, but I was missing 3 stands for the day. I looked up ways online to trick the watch, couldn’t find anything definite, so jumped on to Apple Chat and asked a rep if there was any way to log a stand. You see, with the watch powering down, I had many stands between 5 and 9pm that weren’t registered, even though I was standing. The rep was VERY unhelpful, and I thought all hope was lost…
But while waiting for his replies, I tried to add an activity in the Health app on my phone. I read online that the Activity app gets data from that source, so I tried to add a workout from 11:20am to 11:40am, which would trigger a stand. However, in my haste and desperation (as it was 11:20pm by this time), I accidentally used 11:40pm. Well, I can happily report that it worked, and it logged a stand for that time frame, but that meant it logged a stand an exercise for EVERY hour, as well as thinking I had worked out for over 600 minutes. But my rings got completed, and my calories were accurately measured, so this just means I’ll have to do more than 730 minutes of exercise in one day to break this “record”. Oh well…
Here is the before and after photo!
Day 35 (Sunday Sep 23) – The third week in GigCity was quickly coming to a close. I had decided to go to church at Arise Church, the church I tried to go to the previous weekend. I double-checked the church website and confirmed they were meeting in the Octagon, so I was up by 8;30 to enjoy a LONG, HOT shower. Here’s some shower seflies from that morning…
On my walk into the Octagon for the 10am service, I got some more photos of iconic Dunedin buildings as well Arise church.
The worship was on-point, they had a choir of 21 individuals (3 sets of 7, 7 men, 14 women), and I enjoyed being in a vibrant faith community, as my previous two Sunday services in Dunedin were much smaller and more subdued. The sermon itself is televised to many locations across New Zealand, which is a nice way to make sure all the churches are receiving the same message. The primary message of this Sunday was actually for a once a year Expansion offering, which is used to fund special projects and new church plants. Ultimately, I think this church is doing great things across New Zealand.
However, as I am a “fireball”, I do like to challenge churches on their position on homosexuality, or at least discover what their position is, and Arise didn’t put anything on their website about it. So, after the service was done, I waited for the Pastor to have a free moment to talk. Unfortunately, I found him as he was gathering his things to leave, so I had to quickly pose the question of Arise church’s position on homosexuality. And he gave me the routine answer that you initially get when you ask that question. He said that this was a church who would love everyone who came through the doors, as that was what Christ commanded. I tried to dig deeper into it by asking if the church viewed homosexuality as a sin, but he said that was a much larger question, which I agree with. But, it also leads me to believe that they think homosexuality IS a sin, and therefore anyone who ISN’T heterosexual should remain celibate for the rest of their lives…
But, that’s me assuming, and the Pastor said to email him, which I did right after the event. Here’s what I wrote.
From: Derek Shaw <derekmshaw@yahoo.com>
To: info@arisechurch.com
My name is Derek Shaw and I attended church today at the Arise Dunedin campus. I was impressed with the church as I heard about all the wonderful things it has accomplished in the past year as well as all of its goals for the coming year.
After the service, I approached Pastor Sam regarding how Arise Church views homosexuality. He said that Arise is about loving God and loving people. He also was on his way out the door, so I couldn’t follow up with additional questions.
Because, while I wholeheartedly agree that love should be the mission of the church (Jesus himself said those were the two greatest commandments), I still want to know how Arise views the concept of homosexuality. Specifically, is homosexuality a sin? And if so, in what contexts is it sinful? Is it a sin to have same-sex attraction? Can it be “healed” or “changed”? If it can’t, what does God require of homosexuals in the church? Should they remain celibate?
I would really like to talk about these concepts in person rather than via email, as I appreciate conversations more than words on a page or screen. Hopefully we can set up a meeting in the coming weeks to discuss this issue.
Thank you for your time, attention, and prompt reply,
Your brother in Christ,
Derek
So, hopefully I will be able to write more about their stance once I hear back from the church.
After church, I went and got some lunch at McDonalds (yes, I know…but it’s still quick, easy, relatively cheap food here). After lunch, I met a guy from Grindr at Starbucks to talk for an hour. And I worked out some details for next month’s new experience, which will remain a secret at this time…
I spent the rest of the afternoon reading a book called The Crystal Skull. It’s historical fiction about real-life crystal skulls and the 2012 Mayan prediction for the end of the world. It was written in 2007, and while the world didn’t end in 2012, the ending explanation for why the author wrote the book still applies for today. Because I believe, as the author does, that the next evolutionary step we need to take as humanity needs to be a spiritual one.
Whew! Another monumental week! I now have a car! I learned to surf! I completed another scuba dive!
One small downside…Guy hasn’t texted me at all. I’m afraid I’ll leave Dunedin without seeing him again, but at the same time, if he doesn’t want to see me, then I can’t force it. And I will probably cave and text him once more to say good-bye, or at least see you later, because there is a chance I might return to Dunedin in October, especially now that I have Tuatoru!
Thanks for reading. As always, your reward for getting to the end is a song.
Since this has been the longest worded post to date (5000 words), you deserve not one but TWO songs. And they are both from Davis Mallory, the artist I talked about at the beginning of this post. Two of his songs have specifically spoken to me this past week. I’ll let you experience the lyrics on your own, but you can probably understand why I connect with the lyrics.